Fort Birthday

Go from Crapsule Wardobe to a Mom’s Capsule Wardrobe

Part Two – click here for part one of Mom’s capsule wardrobe

Once I realized I was doing exactly the same basket of MY laundry every week I knew I needed some more clothing options to round out my Mom’s capsule wardrobe. See Part One. Like so many Moms I could happily curate my twins’ outfits and ignore my own.

I decided this winter to spend a fraction of what I spend keeping my twins looking adorable on myself. Sometimes self care means putting the focus on yourself.

I know I’m not the only mom who does this. I don’t spend a ton on clothes, but I’m not sure why it took me so long to figure out that only my KIDS always looked cute in pictures.

At first a note about my ADD and Shopping

This really could be (and might end up) a blog post unto itself. Here’s how my brain shops for clothes:

“Ooooooh. Look at that sea of things. I must touch them all.”

“Wait, see that green? That amazing green. Forget everything else and focus only on that green.”

“ooooh, it’s perfectly between teal and forest. I must have it. Who cares if it’s a crop top sweatshirt? It doesn’t matter that the neckline is going to drive me crazy. It’s so green.”

And so forth.

So I have tons of shopping failures in my closet that have one feature I adore (color, texture, detail, etc) but otherwise is completely unwearable by me. I’m bad at shopping for clothes, and I know it.

I like fashion. I’m not afraid of color or patterns. But I’m terrible at putting looks together. And despite constant offers from my sister to go shopping, I couldn’t focus enough on myself to make those trips productive.

Just What I needed for my Mom’s capsule Wardrobe: A stylist.

Before traveling to a blogging conference this spring, I finally asked for some help with my wardrobe. On an amazing and supportive FB group I asked for some shopping suggestions.

A stylist from the group, Rachel Blythe, reached out to me and we decided to work together to overhaul my Mom’s capsule wardrobe. This was the best decision I’ve made in a long time.

Here’s how it worked: I gave her my measurements, my budget, my goals (4 days of outfits), and a capsule wardrobe pinterest board I created with looks I liked. I also sent her some more pictures of me. She sent me options for: 3 pants, 2 dresses, 1 formal dress, 6 tops, 2 bags, 2 pairs of shoes, and 1 necklace.

I took her ideas and expanded in some categories and over a month did a bunch of shopping. Lots of Old Navy which fit my budget and style. Working with her was one of the best things I’ve ever done.

Facing Reality – Going all Marie Kondo on my closet

Once I got all these clothes I faced reality: the tragedy/history/comedy currently stuffing my closet to the max. So before I unpacked any of my new things I took literally everything out of my closet. EVERYTHING.

It took 3 hours to get everything out and categorized. I kept a few staple items. But otherwise I said goodbye to 90% of my clothes.

Here’s what the purge looked like

Tragedy – The aspirational wardrobe

Every woman has one – Those clothes, those GREAT clothes, those one day we might wear them clothes. Pre-Baby clothes that aren’t ever going to look good on my Post-baby body even if they are the right size.

Those good jeans you fit into for those couple of glorious months in your 30s….

I spent 10 years doing construction. The problem living where you work (renovating my house) is that even though you are wearing your one pair of yoga pants that doesn’t have paint on them, you just Must touch up that molding in the bathroom.

Maternity Clothes when your kids are 3 years old

Maternity jeans are the shit. Jeans with an elastic panel I can pull up to my bra, “YES, PLEASE”. I gave up my maternity jeans around 18 months after my twins were born. I’ll always miss you, comfiest jeans ever.

But I kept the maternity shirts, they are very.. forgiving with my squishy belly. Soft clothes that hide a multitude of sins are just what you need sometimes.

I’m not giving up the granny panties. I’m replacing them as they wear out, but see above for my comment on maternity jeans.

“Austria. Wien Natuhistorisches museum Venus von Willendorf. Die Venus von Willendorf ist eine Venusfigurine aus der jüngeren Altsteinzeit (Jungpaläolithikum), dem Gravettien, und ist als Österreichs bekanntestes Fundstück heute im Naturhistorischen Museum”by Morton1905 is licensed under CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

History

I’m a sucker for clothes with a story. The first really good piece of athletic wear I bought. My college sweatshirt. Those pajamas I wore camping and burned a hole in the shin. Shit, I’ve got a scarf I bought in 1993.

I have two wrap dresses that look good on me regardless of my size that I bought 20 years ago (from Walmart, too, would you believe it?). There’s that shirt that my big sister also bought so we showed up to an event as twinsies. (which btw now has paint on it).

‘They’ told us to invest in nice classic pieces so I did. Which is why You keep seeing me in family photos in the same six outfits.

There’s that sports bra I got in 2002 that is exactly the right amount of failed elastic now to be comfy to sleep in. I would fairly say that 60% of my wardrobe was over 3 years old, 50% over 5, and 20% over 10.

Comedy – Bathing Suits and Shoes

Some of them aspirational. But so many more that fall into the WHAT WAS I THINKING category. I’m not shy about my body regardless of my size. I tend to not even think twice about it. You’re gonna get the jiggle whether you like it or not.

Honestly, the number of dear-god-no-no-no suits is out of hand. Especially when I really only wear one suit (which btw has bottoms that are 12 years old (lols).

I have big feet (10-11 depending on the style). This makes shoe shopping a disappointment most of the time. What happens, is that I have an event I need shoes for, I panic, buy something ridiculous that will work for the night and then never wear those shoes again. It’s a clown college worth of gigantic absurd shoes.

Taking a new approach to getting dressed with Mom’s capsule wardrobe

Planning outfits ahead of time is my new approach to my mom’s capsule wardrobe. Rather than putting things away by category, I try and assemble outfits. Not only does this make my closet way more organized. I don’t lose or forget about things.

That way, I can just pull an outfit out of my closet. Cardigans or jackets rotate in and out with outfits and the weather. And I picked colors and styles that will take me through the fall.

Making outfits (even for working out and bedtime) helped me identify where my Mom’s capsule wardrobe was bloated:

I have so too many tee shirts, dozens of socks I don’t wear, rando ‘good’ workout clothes that have never seen the light of day, etc.

This lets me keep a handle on future shopping. No matter how cute and no matter how on sale, I don’t need any more athletic wear.

Paying attention to what works helps in the long run

I’ve been taking mirror selfies of my outfits. Sometimes I feel like a rockstar in an outfit and look like a open-mike night reject. Looking back at the selfies I’ve been taking helps me refine my style and see what is working.

It also gives me an objective look at what is NOT working.

That wonderful soft tank-top.. makes me look pregnant unless I do a french tuck. That one sundress.. WAY shorter than I think. and so forth.

Finding a Stylist

Lots of people use and like subscription box stylist services. There are tons of them, even ones that cater to plus size ladies. Who, after all, want to look cute too.

Nicer department stores will offer free stylist consultations. I’ve done this at Nordstroms and it was fun. It’s a more powerful tool when you’ve done some homework on styles and looks you like and have some images to show the stylist you work with.

Personal Stylist – I found Rachel on a gigantic and active FB group (10K+) that caters to women by asking. Try reaching out in your own regional and city groups to find someone. The results aren’t just that I look really cute these days; I genuinely feel better about myself.

Mom’s Capsule Wardrobe is what self care looks like for me this spring

I’m someone who doesn’t care much about how others perceive my appearance. So, I am really shocked at how much changing my clothes changes my attitude.

Also, decluttering my closet lifted a huge weight off my shoulders I didn’t even know was there. It’s easier to put away laundry so I actually do it.

I don’t know if anyone reads all the way through, but have you ever worked with a stylist? What was your experience?

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